To avoid pain, we avoid pleasure. To avoid failure, we avoid success. To avoid death, we avoid life. We are stuck in the conflict of the dualities. We are lost and have nowhere to go. We are advancing without a destination.
Welcome to the game of life. Warning- There are no rules.
Each one of us, at some point in life, has known it, realized it, that life is not in our control. In the gush of the wind from the speeding truck and in the dreadful eyes of an infirmed acquaintance, we have all encountered death or its distant relative.
The coin can be tossed at any moment. The living becomes dead, the abstract becomes a reality, the fate flips, marriages fail, riches falter, you are helpless.
The uncertainty, unpredictability of life has played with us all. And we have all lost our expectations, our pride, and gradually, our very selves. We have known victory; we have known defeat. And yet life keeps playing with our minds, emotions, our hearts. And it won’t stop until we surrender.
We move on from moment to moment. Different places, new interactions, new interpretations, different emotions. The memory fades, but the experience stays. Experienced guides, mind abides, emotions rebel, efforts divide. The shadows of the past and the silhouettes of the future, don’t let you live in the moment. And everything is complete mayhem.
That is an ordinary life summarized. But thankfully, we are here to challenge the convention.
Having tasted success once, it’s almost impossible to imagine a life without it. But not every toss results in a tail. Sometimes, life dethrones you without prior notice. And you find yourself, alone, unarmed, and without a plan. It could be anything- a failed achievement, a failed career, a failed life. It’s not a matter of reputation but it’s an inquiry of self-worth. You have known what you are capable of, and now you are everything but. It’s a disastrous realization- one that takes away your night’s sleep and morning’s peace. After all, we are all we have, our only reliable source of admiration.
The outer world becomes your worst enemy. Expectations break and so does their faith. Your life stops but time doesn’t. Suddenly, your circle isn’t that big, and you are not the ‘favorite’ child anymore.
But like every spring that follows the winter, every sunrise that follows the dark night, every difficult time in a person’s life is followed by a lighter one, relatively at least.
Let’s consider the cyclic relationship between success and failure. There are two main aspects to it. One, failure commences where success ends, defining the limits of success. And second, failure is mostly followed by success, owing to the consistent failed attempts at other alternatives.
So, the first step in today’s episode of rediscovery of your lost light is acceptance. As JK Rowling says, “Understanding is the first step to acceptance, and only with acceptance can there be recovery” It is what it is, and trying to convince others and justifying yourself, won’t get anyone anywhere. Let it sink deep into your heart: you can only be that which you are, never anything else. Drop the ideas, encounter reality. The unsettling voice of the world will certainly subside, and the disapproving shadows of your own past will dissipate under the brightness of your rising glory.
Naturally, the second step would be to formulate a plan. Once you know the difference between where you stand and where you want to be, the success story isn’t far away. Create goals. Think it all out. Write it down if it helps. Try to be aware of how you want things to flow. Be precise and pragmatic and in no time, you will be back on track.
The last and the most important step in the execution. Perceive your goal as a destination waiting for you. Take full responsibility for your journey by committing to it throughout, especially in moments of insecurity and uncertainty. Expect to succeed and have faith that it will happen. When fear arises or any form of defeat, stay committed and remind yourself that it is a mere roadblock, only a hurdle, that shall pass as you persevere, and when a jolt of reassurance is needed focus on the positive.
The rough road to success, with its deceitful potholes and conflicting bifurcations, is bound to be an awry journey. But with an unbiased perception, a passionate approach, and devoted implementation, it becomes an adventurous, learning experience. Who knows what awaits at the end? But every challenge, every confrontation will ignite the spark of inner growth which in itself is a success beyond success.